Sadhguru
Why can't I be nice to someone while hating them inside?
Acting nice while thinking badly never works
Your emotions follow what you think, so thinking one way and feeling another is not possible. People try to act it out, saying "I hate her but I'll be nice to her", and it never works.
I cannot think you are wonderful and have nasty emotions towards you, or think you are horrible and have sweet emotions towards you. It is impractical and not possible.