Swami Mukundananda
Why does telling myself "don't be attached" not work, and what does?
Withdrawing the mind from the world
There is one kind of detachment where you keep contemplating, "Don't be attached to this, don't be attached to that." There is another where you have withdrawn your mind from the world. That happens when you decide with your intellect, "I am not the body" and that sense pleasures can never satisfy the yearning of the soul.
This is where you have withdrawn your mind from the world. How does that happen? When you decide with your intellect, "I am not the body, and the pleasures of the senses can never satisfy the yearning of my soul."