Premanand Maharaj Ji
How can I tell if my love is true or just for my own desires?
Test: do I love for them or for me?
Love is true when we see Bhagwan in the other, aim for their happiness, and love them even when they give great adversity. Saying "I love you, so listen to me" is only our desire and ego.
If we see the form of Bhagwan in them and love to give them happiness, and we still love them even if they cause great hardship, that is called love.